Once Upon A
by DREbrokenAMS
Summary: written at 3 am. I had a mac and cheese craving. just a humorous fic for all the lovely peoples out there. Please Review! this is my first oneshot ::oneshot::


**A/N- Written at 3 am after being up 48 hrs. straight. I had a serious mac & cheese craving. I promise I wasn't on drugs. Oh, and the things in parenthesis- **( )** is my input.**

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**Disclaimer: Don't own any of it except Velveetagurke because I am the Cheesekage. . be jealous. lol**

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Once upon a day, in the village of Velveeta (a.k.a. Velveetagurke my village. .) a very hyper, worrisome, powerful, dramatic, clan was bursting with activity. What clan you ask? Why the Yokoto clan of course! (I was tempted to call them a flavor or brand of cheese, believer me! I was sooooo tempted.) They were bustling around the trying to make sure the preparations were...well, um...prepared. Kaillama (yes, that's llama.) wanted everything to go perfectly for his precious little girl. "Amaseiada!" He called out over the racket the rest of his clan was making. "Amasei!" He shouted up the stairs getting a bit stressed that his wife wasn't answering his calls.

"Yes Kai?" Asked the beautiful woman as she descended the stairs, tripping on the last step and falling, (gracefully mind you) into her husband's arms.

"I need some cheese. We have no cheese to go on the sandwiches." He said, helping her back to her feet.

"NO CHEESE? HOW CAN WE NOT HAVE CHEESE? WE LIVE IN THE VILLAGE HIDDEN IN THE CHEESE FOR BUDDHA'S SAKE!" (no, I'm not dissing Buddha.)Amasei screamed nearly fainting with horrors for not having cheese to go on the sandwiches.

Immediately three young men accepted the mission of finding cheese to go on the sandwiches in hopes of it working in their favor. They returned worn-out and panting from the 'mission' (they actually just went to the market.) fifteen minutes after starting it.

"Whatever happened to you?" Amasei asked them worried.

"Did you get the cheese?!?!" Kai asked nearly attacking them.

"Yes, here it is!" The oldest boy, Tonamaru said holding up a bagful (that's a big bag too!) of cheese.

"Thank goodness!" Kai said before running into the kitchen with it.

"Are you boys okay?" Amasei asked them...again.

"Lucky we survived!" Sanamaru (the 2nd oldest) gasped.

"Scarier than Orochimaru!!" Suzuimano (the youngest) panted.

"Whatever happened?" Amasei asked as the boys fell into chairs to catch their breath.

"It all started when we left the house..." Tonamaru started to tell his story..."We walked into the street, looking around for suspicious persons, seeing none, we quickly headed for the goal. When we got there, after fighting out way through the swarm of people, (yes, lots of people live in my village, LOTS of POWERFUL ninja-pirate-people!!!) we inspected the prize. We finally found the best of the best, but it turned out, we were going to have to fight for it!

_**-insert dramatic pause here-**_

This ferocious looking old woman attacked us with her stick-cane-thingy. Almost took Sana's head off!" He added enthusiastically. "Eventually Suzu was able to escape to pay for the prize, then we all split up and met back at the corner. We were lucky to escape!"He finished dramatically.

"Oh you brave, wonderful men!" Amasei said giving them each a hug. (wow...maybe I am on crack...??)

"MOM!!!" Keiatami called down the stairs.

"Coming dear!" Amasei answered her while rushing up the stairs as Kai let more young men into the waiting room as some of the female members of his family rushed food and drinks into the room. (oh my gosh! an almost normal part?! WOW!!!)

Many young ninja from various villages (basically all of the villages) had been forced to come to avoid war. (my village would've torn the others to shreds...ha. .)

As Amasei helped Keia finish getting ready, Kai welcomed the young men and told them a big about how they would choose Keia's 'groom'. (yes, they invited the boys to get Keia a 'groom' to have her get married. yes, her parents love her, but alas, they want peace instead of a teenage girls raging hormones and her drama o.0)

About half an hour later, most of the snacks were gone and the boys...I mean, _young men_, were getting bored.

Finally, Keiatami's mother declared Keiatami presentably ready for the guys. (this means she was completely done up with hair, make-up, and wardrobe.)

When she finally got downstairs, she was rushed into a side room, where she would meet each boy, I mean, _young man_, personally, however, before she was ushered into the room, a certain pair of pale green eyes caught her attention.

While she sat down and waited for her parents to send the first guy back, she couldn't stop thinking of the pale green-blue eyes that seemed to see into her soul.

"Those eyes have many secrets." She whispered to the empty room.

She looked up as the door opened and a young, blonde haired boy was pushed into the room Keia took in his orange outfit and his beautiful bright blue eyes.

"Hi! I'm Naruto Uzamaki! And I'm the next Hokage of the Leaf Village, Konoha! BELIEVE IT!" He practically shouts at her.

"...um...hi, Naruto. I'm Keiatami." She says trying to figure out why he's so weird.

Naruto stares at her for a few moments before sitting down across from her. "What's this while thingymabob for anyway, and why are you so dressed up? ...it looks nice though!" He said –sweat dropping- at the anger that flared in Keia's eyes.

"It's for my parents to find, and, or, choose a groom for me. I'm supposed to be dressed up!" Keia said starting to get angry at the stupid blond.

"Oh, well, I already know who I'm marrying and it's not you!" Naruto jumped up and pointed his index finger at Keiatami, who promptly grabbed him by his jacket, dragged him over to a window, opened the window, and threw him out of it.

After closing the window, she opened the door and her parents continued to send random guys into the room, they all failed, that is, until one certain dark-haired guy put Keiatami in a good mood.

As Keiatami sat there, bored out of her mind, a young, dark-haired, dark-eyed, boy-err, _young man_ entered the room. Keiatami watched him as he walked to the chair and sat down.

_"Hmm...He doesn't seem too bad." _She thought as he looked up at her. "_Well, I don't really like the outfit, but that's alright_."

"Hello, I'm Keiatami." Keia said for the umpteenth time that day.

"Hello, Keiatami! I am Rock Lee! You look very youthful today! Yosh!" Lee said with the traditional tooth –ping- sparkle, thumbs up pose. (HA! I bet you thought it was Sauske! HA. HA. HA. I sowed you.-looks smug until a pencil hits me in the head- AHHHHH! -runs of like a maniac-)

"Umm...thank you?" Keia said wondering if it was a compliment or not.

"You are welcome!" Lee said…youthfully. Keiatami conversed with Lee for a little while, until her parents came in and sent him outside to the waiting area.

"Have you found yourself a groom?" Her parents asked hopefully.

As Keia was about to say yes, those pale green eyes seeped into her thoughts and kept the word locked in her mind. "…maybe." She said trying to clear her thoughts of those hauntingly beautiful eyes.

Her parents' faces fell. "There are only two men left. If you turn both of them down, Rock Lee will be your groom, understand?" Her mother said sternly. It hadn't been nearly this hard to pair her sisters up, although Keiatami did have a fighter's spirit, unlike her sisters, who didn't. (the guys on the mission, yea she turned them down. :þ)

"Yes mother, I understand." Keia sighed. She leaned back in her chair as a rather odd looking fellow walked into the room. He had purple…marks…all over his face, and some mummy thing strapped to his back.

"…" was all Keia could say, or well…not say, to his appearance. He had a yellow aura surrounding him. Keia didn't like yellow.

"Hi….I'm Kankuro." He said removing the mummified thing from his back and sitting down.

"…" Keia's voice failed her as she stared at the creepy mummified thing on the floor. "Keiatami." She said trying to snap out of her fear-induced trance. Eventually she calmed down enough to talk with him for awhile, until the mummified thing started to move. She screamed, LOUDLY, and backed away from the creepy, moving, mummified thing as her parents and Rock Lee rushed into the room.

"It…it MOVED!" Keia gasped.

Kankuro started laughing. BIG MISTAKE. You see, you don't laugh AT Keiatami; you can laugh WITH her, but most definitely NOT AT her, especially with her parents around.

"Are you LAUGHING AT my little girl?" Her father suddenly grew very tall and scary while Keia was sending Kankuro death glares and her mom was poking the mummified…thing.

Kankuro suddenly fell deathly quiet. He sweat dropped and audibly gulped. "Err…no?" He squeaked before grabbing the mummified thing and running in terror from the house.

Upon Kankuro's exit, Keia's father quickly returned to his normal size and lost his scary-ness. Keia relaxed a little, but would not move from her spot.

"We'll send the last guy in." Her father said, escorting Keia's mom and an extremely terrified Lee from the room.

Keia stood at the window, looking out at as a light breeze ran its long fingers through her hair. She was tired. Oh, so very tired. _"Why won't these beautiful freaking eyes quit haunting me?"_ She screamed in her head as she heard the door open and shut. It sounded very far away; she closed her eyes as the breeze made her hair dance around her face. Keia sighed; she had finally found a little peace. She just had to have the hell scared out of her first. With her eyes closed all she could see where those hauntingly beautiful eyes.

She barely stifled a scream as she was spun around, and she opened her eyes, only to find the eyes she had been thinking about all day, staring back into her eyes. They stood there for who knows how long, him staring into her eyes, her staring into his.

Although, after a little while something came flying through the window and hit Keia in the back of the head, which concluded in her lips connecting with the so-far-nameless-hottie's lips in front of her. Both were surprised at first, but the shock wore off in a few milliseconds and the meeting of their lips (a.k.a. kiss) became a bit more...err…passionate.

However, Keiatami and the-nameless-hottie needed to breathe at some point, and eventually dis-connected their lips. Upon this disconnection, Keiatami took at deep breath and oxygen rushed into her air-deprived lungs. The same happened for said-so-far-nameless-hottie. (lol)

Keia looked back out the window and saw a blonde haired teenage girl in a white dress/robe thing running away with what looked like a giant fan/stick thingy on her back. (ha ha. fan/stick thingy lol)

"Temari." A deep voice mumbled beside her. (uh-oh. tee hee!)

"What?" Keia asked, not quite catching what he had said.

"Nothing…my name's Gaara of the Desert." He informed her, turning away from the window. (gee…abrupt much?)

"Oh…yea…I'm Keiatami." She said a bit shyly. (after all, they didn't know each others names and they've already kissed. lol)

They stood there in silence for a few moments both of the teens, lost for words, replaying the kiss in their minds. All of a sudden, they both looked back at each other and started to make-out…again. This time, they head the door open and as soon as they heard it, they tore themselves away from each other and looked towards the door, only to see two overly happy parents standing there.

"Oh! We're so happy!" Keia's parents exclaimed…at the same time.

"As if we hadn't noticed." Keia and Gaara said…at the same time.

The parents looked at each other as Keia and Gaara stared at each other.

"So, is he your choice?" Amasei asked her daughter. Keia nodded her head, her eyes locked on Gaara's. "Do you accept?" She asked Gaara. He also nodded, his eyes locked on Keiatami's.

"YES!!!" Kai and Amasei nearly screamed. "Our daughters going to marry the soon-to-be Kazekage!" They chanted.

Keia's face took on an expression of shock. "Future Kazekage? As in the leader of Suna?" She questioned unbelieving.

"…yes…" Gaara answered slowly.

"So you mean you're…but that means…I can't…but then…awwwww!" Keia groaned before passing out.

"She'll wake up and be okay soon." Kai assured Gaara, who caught Keia in his arms.

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Keia was ready. Today was her day, and no one could ruin it…except the creepy mummified thing that was sitting in the waiting room, because the purple-face-marks-guy was the best man. Other that that, Keia was happy. Her dad walked her down the aisle, Gaara and Keia said their vows, and they went on a lovely honeymoon. Where? Um…err…a village they'd both never been too. Then of course, they went back to Suna, Keia raised the kids (yes, Gaara and her had kids, no they weren't demonic!! Gosh.) They lived happily ever after, except when Keia saw the mummified thing move, and she set it on fire, then she was happy again. Although, Kankuro wanted her to die. They eventually settled their differences. o.O

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**A/N- Hope ya liked it! Review please! My first one shot. No flames please, unless you wanna be hunted down by my beloved fans o.O **


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